Talk it Out
by BR511
Summary: Olivia comes back from Oregan and finds it hard to talk with Elliot. Now she has a case that get's a little too personal, will she and Elliot be able to talk it out? EO friendship, may evolve. not much EO in first chapter
1. Chapter 1

**Disclaimer: not mine**

**AN: first svu fic. May become EO. Mostly focuses on their friendship though. Most chapters will be longer…if I decide to continue.**

"911 state your emergency." The voice sounded mechanical—almost inhuman.

Suddenly Andrea had second thoughts, what the hell was she doing? With a sharp intake of breath she tried to begin…

"Hello? State your emergency please." The voice sounded more urgent then it did when the she had first answered it, more human. For some irrational reason this seemed to make her feel a little better like somebody was actually trying to help her.

"I—I-I found something." She stated a matter of factly.

"Yes…" The operator droned trying to decide if this was a prank or not.

"A list. I think it's a hit list." She said softly her voice wavering a little but making sure she got her point across.

"Where are you?" If this list was in fact real the operator didn't want it being blamed on her that they didn't catch it.

"Home."

"Sweetie what's your name? How old are you?" She asked gently, trying to coax the information out of her.

"Andrea. I'm fourteen."

"Alright we're going to send a car to your house what's the address? Hon, I don't want you to move, alright?"

6969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969696969

"What've you got?" She asked the uniform as he handed her a fairly large stack of files along with a tattered piece of paper on top.

"Careful." The uniform said as he helped her put the files on her desk. "We got a 911 call about a hit list of some sort so we sent a car to check it out. We checked the names through the system and all of them have reported a rape." He said slowly as her pen danced across the legal pad, taking notes. "Except for the last name. Emily Riggle." He said finished.

"And you're sure?" Olivia said looking over the piece of paper with a list of 6 names:

Maria Antonio

Lauren Phelps

Izzy Tresh

Sabrina Morgan

Lily Amber

Emily Riggle – save the best for last.

"Double and triple checked ma'am." The officer assured her. "All their cases are open."

"Alright. Thank you." Olivia said sighing heavily. This wasn't exactly how she liked to start her day. "Can we please talk to the person who found the list please?"

"She's on her way. I was told to warn you though, she's very anxious and doesn't really have a clue what she found. She's confused."

Olivia nodded completely understanding, "We'll get Dr. Huang on it. Thanks officer." After waving he left the 1-6 Elliot walked in.

"Hey, sorry I'm late, brought some coffee. What do we have?"

She accepted the coffee mumbling a thanks in his direction.

"Fill Elliot in." Don instructed to Olivia.

Reluctantly Olivia started to tell him how the day started.

**AN: so Olivia and Elliot aren't on the best speaking terms right now, all will change in due course. That is if I continute…**


	2. Chapter 2

**Not mine.**

**AN: hey guys I'm sorry I haven't updated lately. I'm telling you right now if I don't update for a while it will eventually get updated. My roommate's just a freak this year and I'm trying to deal with that and the new school year (yeah, my school starts late). But anyways I'm sure you guys honestly don't really come here to hear about that kind of stuff so next time this'll get updated is in October—I'm sorry. I am super glad you guys are liking it though and never doubt me. Errors will be made and I'm sorry, I try to fix every one of them but sometimes I won't catch a few. Also I think maybe a long chapter every month-ish sounds good seeing as I can't really post that often?**

**By the way this takes place around "screwed" **

_**This one's dedicated to Elton John **_

"_**It's a little bit funny**_

_**this feeling inside**_

_**I'm not one of those **_

_**Who can, easily hide**_

_**I don't have much money**_

_**but boy if I did**_

_**I'd buy a big house where**_

_**We both could live.**_

_**If I were a sculptor**_

_**But then again no,**_

_**Or a man who makes potions **_

_**In the traveling show.**_

_**I, know it's not much **_

_**But it's the best I can do.**_

_**My gift is my song **_

_**And this one's for you"**_

"It's just not working." She said to her best friend, she was wining a little and she knew it but she had to be given some credit here, she was only now just venting about her fucked up relationship with her partner. "I don't understand it. We were best friends, I leave, I come back, he gets his wife pregnant and we stop talking?"

"Give him a chance." Casey knew that Olivia wasn't into chances especially when it came Elliot but they both needed to work on it, she knew that it wasn't just Elliot with the problem.

"You know I can't do that! He just stopped talking to me. We used to share everything and now I'm lucky if I know if he's with his wife!"

"I know that's what's bothering you Liv, you need to talk it out. Just because he didn't tell you one thing doesn't mean that he didn't want to."

"Case, it's not like that. You know that it wouldn't be this way if that was the only problem. We just don't mesh like we used to. Maybe I do need a permanent change of partners." Olivia had never really had that thought, sure she had requested temp partners but a permanent one? She and Elliot had worked so well together since their first day, what happened?

"I understand where you're coming from, I do. But maybe you guys should talk before you make this decision. He's a part of you, and we both know you won't be as good of a detective if he were to not be your partner. You'd still be an amazing one don't get me wrong it's just you don't get that connection with another person twice, most are lucky to find it."

"That's the thing! The connection doesn't exist any more! It's no longer there! We have stopped connecting! It just gets in the way of our work all the time. I don't know how to make him talk, and I don't feel like I can talk to him anymore." She had calmed down but she was still pretty ticked off, she knew Casey was right no matter what way she worded it: she was nothing with out Elliot Stabler.

696969696969696969696969696969696969696969

"Where have you been?" Elliot asked her after she had come back ten minutes late from her lunch break, one she would have spent with him before they started fighting.

"Lunch." She mumbled shifting papers around her desk, avoiding his eyes.

"You're late and the girl who found the list is waiting." He said growing angrier, how did she get off taking a long lunch and then just showing up?

"I was with Casey. Calm down. I'll go handle her, you're obviously a little too worked up to handle a witness." She said a bit snidely, but he deserved it. Didn't he? Why was he yelling at her, she was only having some girl talk.

Blowing air out of his nose he sighed and followed her into interview room two.

"Hi sweetie." Olivia said putting on her fake smile, she was god at doing that when she was pissed as fuck. "What's you name? I'm Olivia." She said putting her hand out.

"Andrea." Andrea seemed timid and barely acknowledged Olivia's hand as she lightly tried to lift hers.

"I need you to tell me exactly what happened. Do you think you can do that?" She asked softly, trying to coax the information out of her.

Andrea went on to tell her how she had found the list outside of school and all of those girls went to her school. She had known that the police had spoken to a few of the girls and knew something happened, thus being a smart girl turned it in. Or half smart. Elliot and Olivia found out about two minutes into the interview she was a bit of a ditz.

"Alright. Thank you Andrea. We knew that was hard for you." She handed her, her card and told her to call if she needed or remembered anything.

6969696969696969696969696969

"Everybody's legit." Elliot said walking up to the white board everybody was surrounding. "They were all raped. We need to find this guy fast. He could be escalating."

"Somebody call Huang." Don said sighing. "We need this guy profiled. Munch and Fin you go canvas the school see if there were people who saw this guy who had the list. Elliot and Liv, this is gonna be one of the hardest parts. Go to Emily's house inform her parents and bring them all in."

"Shit." Olivia said looking down at the pictures of the battered girls. "We don't need another girl like this."

69696969696969696969696969

"You ready?" Elliot asked trying to get some conversation going.

Ignoring him Olivia sighed and knocked on the door twice.

" 'Ello?" A spanish speaking woman asked opening the door.

"I'm here for Mr. and Mrs. Riggle." Olivia said showering her, her badge. "And Emiy Riggle."

"Si, si." The woman said waving them into the living room. "One second."

Thirty seconds later an extremely tall almost bald man walked into the room closely followed by a woman who was about five six. She had blonde curly hair that fell down to about bellow her ears. Her blue eyes were covered by glasses but still visible and her simple outfit and heels said 'going out to the grocery store, be back later sweetie.' She had a pale fact, but not pasty, a face that worked.

"Hi I'm Marvin Riggle." He said shaking both of their hands.

"I'm Lacy Yearling." The woman said shaking their hands as well. "Please, would you like something to drink?" After they both politely declined she asked them what they were doing here.

After they explained that their daughter was in danger Lacy looked paler then she did when she walked into the living room. "My baby?" She asked.

"I'm sorry Ms. Yearling." Olivia said trying to comfort her.

"Lacy, please. What does this mean?" She asked.

"Detective Stabler here is going to answer your questions is it ok of I go up and speak to you daughter?" She asked and Lacy made a move to stand up but Olivia caught it. "I'm sorry but we usually like to do that kind of stuff alone. They tend to talk more with out their parents."

"Of course." She said trying to do anything she could to help. "Up to the left."

6969696969696969696969

The door was open but Olivia politely knocked on the door.

"Yeah??" Asked a teenage girl sitting at her desk typing something into her MacBook. "What's up?" She asked turning around not hiding her surprise when she saw Olivia standing there. "Excuse me?"

Standing up to greet her, Emily gracefully stood at least five foot nine. She was in a pair of extremely short cut offs and a button down shirt which was open exposing a white tank top. Her brown hair gently framed her gorgeous face, her blue eyes twinkling, her full lips slightly opened. In contrast to her hair her face was pale, but still made her look gorgeous. She could have easily passed for 17, 18, 19, maybe even 20. With her small waist and womanly curves she looked anything but her age.

Impressed with her beauty Olivia had a delayed reaction but quickly recovered pulling her badge out. "Detective Olivia Benson. Is this Emily?" She asked wondering if she had gotten and older sisters room or something.

"Mhm." She said slowly eyeing Olivia up and down, nodding. "I'm Emily." She said after a moments silence putting her hand out for Olivia to shake. "I'm sorry, am I supposed to know why you're here?" She asked wondering if she missed an email or a call from one of your parents.

"No. I can assure you, you probably didn't know I was coming."

"Well, sit." She said motioning her head to the chair she left vacant when she went to greet Olivia. Emily sat on her bed slightly bending her legs making her mile long legs into a shape of an upside down v.

"I need to ask you a few questions."

"About what?" She asked narrowing her eyes, they turned to ice and her lips formed a pout, wondering what was going on.

Olivia asked her if she knew the girls on the list and she replied yes. Olivia told her she was in danger and explained why.

"So some psycho is after me?" She asked blatantly.

"Well, if you want to put it that way."

Suddenly her phone started buzzing on her desk. Her sidekick was flashing all different colors and she ran over to pick it up. Olivia read the caller ID "James P".

"I'm sorry. Excuse me." She said answering the phone.

"Hey there." She said into the phone taking her position back on the bed. "Yeah I'm not sure if I can make it tonight sorry…mhm….alright….yeah later sounds good….just call me later….love you too…" She said rolling her eyes examining her nails. "Nah ah ah, you lost those privileges young man." She said laughing at their inside joke. "Alright talk to you later." She said flipping the phone shut. "Sorry about that."

"I need to ask some questions now." Olivia said ignoring what just happened. "How old are you?"

"Fourteen."

"Fourteen?" She asked.

"I look old for my age, I get that a lot. You have no idea."

"Do you have any boyfriends?" She asked thinking that it'd be safe to check out that James or any other guy she has in her life, with looks like those she's bound to have a couple.

"Nope."

Looking at the pictures that she had posted up on the wall she noticed she had a lot of friends. Some pictures were with guys some with girls. The ones with the guys were usually with them kissing her cheek or vice versa but there was one that caught Olivia's attention the most. It was a picture of somebody giving Emily a piggyback ride, she had her head thrown up in laughter and he was trying to keep her up on his back.

"An ex?"

"A couple. I'm still tight with them, though. There's no way they could have done this."

"You can never be too sure, I'm going to need their names." Olivia said gently thinking she was going to refuse.

Sighing she told her the only three guys she's dated.

"That's it?" She asked in disbelief.

"What do I look like, a whore? I don't just go out with any guy who asks me."

"I wasn't implying anything…"

"Relax. I really don't care." Emily said laughing at Olivia's immediate reaction.

"Anybody been bothering you lately?"

"Who hasn't been bothering me?" She asked as her phone started ringing again. "Shit." She mumbled picking it up. "Hello? Hey Tay. Yeah I can't chill tonight I'm sorry…yeah something came up…no nothing like that…heyyy would I ditch? Haa no just things, we'll talk later? Alright love you too bye." She said hanging up the phone. "Sorry, what were we saying?"

"Actually, we may need to continue this down at the precinct. I'm sorry."

"Alright." She said getting up from her bed. "I assume my parents are coming as well?" She asked slipping her shoes on. Olivia nodded and they headed off to the precinct.

696969696969696969696969696969696969

Lacy lightly stroked her daughter's hand as she pondered what kind of trouble her daughter was in.

"Mom, it's going to be fine." Emily said as she kissed her moms hand and got up following Olivia into an interview room.

"Alright Emily this is my partner Elliot Stabler." Olivia said introducing Elliot as everybody got settled. "And this is Dr. Huang, he's a psychiatrist. He's only here as a formality." She explained.

"Nice to meet you both." She said shaking their hands.

"We already established that you have three ex's. We need to know if you've noticed any guys following you, or anybody who's overly obsessive." Olivia said as she turned to Emily.

"It's New York City, it would be weird not having a sketchy guy on every street." She said making light of the situation. "But honestly, nothing out of the norm." She said shrugging trying to think. "There was some guy lurking outside of the school though last week, but I figured maybe he was picking his kid up."

"Can you describe him?" She asked.

"Tall, six three maybe? Blonde hair, kind of sketchy looking, probably in his early to mid forties."

"Alright we're going to get a sketch artist to talk to you about that." Emily nodded and they continued with their questions.

When Olivia had gotten all of the information she let Huang take over with his questions.

"Hi Emily." He said in his usual neutral tone.

"Hi, Dr." She replied with coolness.

He pulled out a file and put it in the middle of them. "Do you know what this is?" He asked her.

"Should I?" She asked with the same coolness as before.

"It's your psychiatric records." He said making a move to open it but decided against it and folded his hands in his lap. This made Olivia perk up—she had a psychiatric record?

"Not that I care or anything, but aren't those supposed to be private? Doctor patient confidentiality and what not?"

"Yeah they are. But we got permission."

"That's great. I still don't see how they're relevant to anything." She said shrugging looking from the file to the Doctor to Olivia to Elliot and then back down to the envelope.

He then opened the file and scanned its contents. Emily's face had no emotion what so ever. It wasn't like she had anything to worry about, there wasn't anything incriminating in there.

"We just like to keep tabs on our potential victims." Huang explained as he pulled something out of the file. "It says here you've seen two psychiatrists?"

"If it says so it must be true." She said rolling her eyes, why the hell was she here? Nothing actually happened to her.

"Your first one was at age ten?"

"Yeah, so?" She asked softly as she played with her hands under the table. "We thought I had ADD. That just makes me a target for rape doesn't it?" She spat out annoyed at this whole process.

He calmly ignored her and flipped through the file. "And your current psychiatrist, it says you brought up ADD again? What happened with your old doctor?"

"Nothing happened. He told me I didn't have it so I never saw him again. Then four years later I needed a psychiatrist and my mom mentioned it to him once."

"Why do you see your current psychiatrist?" He asked.

Suddenly it was about to happen, she always knew when it was going to happen. Her chest always felt tight, and it felt like somebody was sitting on her front side. Her senses became alert, everything she heard became ten times louder and everything she saw became ten times brighter. She could hear the blood whoosh through her ears, her breathing was becoming irregular but she fought it. Silently she rubbed her temples and chewed on her bottom lip willing for it to stop.

"Something the matter?" He asked.

"Headache." She mumbled, but this was much more then a headache. Being a pro she hid it and took a deep breath. "I'm fine." Then she felt like she was on a marry-go-round. She shut her eyes and breathed in deeply. "I'm sorry, I think I need some Advil." She said trying to hide her discomfort but with each passing second that just became harder and harder. Her stomach began to churn and she could feel the nausea creep into her senses.

"Do you need to lay down?" Olivia asked sweetly, by her side.

"I don't know." She mumbled miserably, she just wanted it to be over, but this was the worst part. She had gotten so good at hiding these she was proud but her stomach felt like it had hit rock bottom. Depression filled her lungs and she felt like she needed some fresh air. "I need some air."

Olivia led Emily to the break room/cribs and Emily lay down uncomfortable. Olivia said she was going to be right back and right after she left Emily gasped for a breath, it was happening, it was happening now and it was happening fast. She gasped a few times and sat up straight, the world felt like it was spinning out of control for a second and then it was over. Just like that. Her chest expanded and she caught her breath. She lied down waiting for Olivia to come back.

696969696969696969696969696969696969696969

"You feeling better?" Olivia asked as Emily woke up. She offered her some water but Emily shook her head no thanks.

"Yeah. Thanks." She said sitting up. "I'm fine. I'm sorry. I had a migraine, I didn't need to sleep though."

"Yeah you needed to." Olivia said smiling softly.

"Maybe a little bit. But we were in the middle of something I could have waited."

Olivia ignored her and asked if her headache was gone.

"Yeah I'm fine." She said smiling her fake smile because she was fine or at least she was going to be.

"You sure?"

"I'm fine." She repeated laughing slightly at how much she cared.

"You can stay in here for a little while we don't have to immediately begin again." She said still worried about her health.

She began to protest but sighed and rubbed her eyes. "I probably won't get back to sleep." She said lamely.

"That's fine. We'll watch some TV."

"Alright." She said, she really did need a break. Under any other circumstances she would have just gotten the interview over with. "I just—it's just—can you tell my mom I'm still sleeping? I don't need to deal with this right now? I mean I know that's a weird thing to ask. It probably sounds horrible but..,"

"I understand." She said smiling. "They just want you to have some rest."

They flipped the channels until they found a friends marathon and began watching.

Elliot walked in and told Olivia that Cragen needed her so she left and he took her spot on the couch. "Hey."

"Hi." She replied looking at the television screen. "What time is it?"

"Five thirty."

"Crap, what channels the game on?" She asked looking for the remote.

"Heat vs. Nicks?" He asked slightly impressed that she'd want to watch a pro basketball game.

"No, the Dolphins vs. Giants because it's definantly football season." She said rolling her eyes.

"Ouch." He said, she could be a bitch.

She started laughing at him and he gave her a look. "What's so funny?"

"Nothing." She said suppressing her giggles. She put the game on and they watched in silence for a little while.

"He's gonna miss." She said after twenty minutes of silence. Shaq went up to the free throw line and shot and air ball. "Who called it?"

"Anybody could have called that." He argued.

"But who called it? Cause I didn't hear you saying that he was going to miss."

"Alright, alright. Settle down." He said amused by her ferociousness. "So what did happen in the interview room?" He asked after another 10 minutes of silence.

"Killer headache." She said lying perfectly.

Olivia walked back in, "are you guys alright?' She asked sitting down.

Not being able to stand another second in the same room as her he made some excuse about DD5's and walked out.

"Jeez. What happened there?" She asked rolling her eyes at the tension.

"Nothing."

"What ever you say." She said turning her attention back to the game.

"I'll tell you if you tell me what went on in the interview room today. Huang and Elliot may believe that crap but something happened to you."

For a second she really did want to tell her, she wanted to tell somebody. She didn't even tell her psychiatrist this shit, that's kinda pointless. "I had a headache. Your turn."

"Alright, you give me bull I bull you right back."

"How do I know I can trust you?" She asked evenly. "If I tell you this, you might tell the Doctor or your captain. Or my parents."

"You're going to have to trust me." She said simply.

"I can't do that." Emily said her eyes fixed on the TV.

It didn't quite click for Olivia, "Will you at least tell me why you see a psychiatrist?"

"Saw." She corrected. "I don't go to him anymore. I saw him because I used to get anxiety attacks."

"Why'd you stop?"

"I stopped getting them." She lied.

"Alright."

They continued to watch the game until Emily spoke up, "What if I tell you, but you can not tell anybody. Not my parents, they'd fucking kill me."

"You have my word but if what you tell me means that you're going to harm yourself or others then I have to tell."

"I understand that. But I need to deal with this myself." Olivia noticed that Emily was a very independent person, she was intimidating at times even for a fourteen year old. She nodded and Emily started, "I still get the panic attacks. Which in retrospect really isn't that big of a deal but they're horrible and when I went to get help for them it didn't work. I can handle them by myself."

It was then that Olivia noticed why she first took an interest in Emily. It wasn't because she was gorgeous or because she was unintentionally the kind of bitch you couldn't put your finger on. It was both of those things and more but it was the way she was tragically alone. You could just tell when you looked at her; you didn't even have to know her. She probably has it all, friends, family, money, beauty, but for some reason it was tragic. It never showed in her eyes or her stature but for some reason she was just a troubled girl.

"I'm not going to say anything." Olivia said keeping her promise, "but you're going to need help."

"No I'm not." She said stubbornly.

"Eventually you will."

"I already got help and it obviously didn't work. They don't come as frequently anymore."

"You ever think that maybe the problem wasn't your psychiatrist?"

"It wasn't." She mumbled. "Whatever. I'll deal with it on my own time. Now don't think I forgot about your problem." She said smiling, showing her straight white teeth.

Olivia had used this trick to find out what was on Emily's mind but she never thought she'd have to hold up her end of the bargain. Olivia considered giving Emily bull shit but she knew not only was Emily too smart for that but she should at least give her the courtesy because, as far as she knew Emily was being honest with her. "I would tell you I really would," Olivia started off. "I just don't know." Just then the door opened and Elliot stood at the frame but neither of them noticed. He just stood there trying to catch their conversation. "We were best friends, we were so close. He told me things he didn't even trust his wife with, which for the record I'm not proud about but we were best friends. And then he got separated, he's getting a divorce, and I asked for anew partner then I came back and got assigned under cover. I mean it's not like I asked for that! And now he acts all weird around me and he failed to mention that he got back together with his wife and they're pregnant. I just don't need to deal with him anymore, we haven't spoken for days." It then dawned on her that Emily looked and acted older but she was fourteen, and not only was she fourteen but she just unloaded all of that information on her. "I'm sorry—"

"Don't be." Emily said glad to have the spotlight off of her for a little, she was good at helping people. "It's just, I mean, you said you haven't talked to him in a while, just, maybe, you should talk?

This felt like déjà vu to her, had she not had this conversation earlier this morning with Casey? "It just isn't that easy" She said, she knew she should have lied, of course a fourteen year old would just have that answer, everything wasn't so damn easy.

"I know it's not." She said simply, turning to Olivia. "But if that relationship is that important to you then you're going to do the work. If it isn't then get a new partner I guess, I don't know if you'll ever find that connection though."

"He keeps blocking me out too!" She said, it wasn't all her fault. She kept throwing up road blocks to try and get this kid stumped but that didn't do it.

"Maybe he cares." She said quietly looking down. This had obviously struck a cord with her; she probably has experienced something like it.

"Well I care too."

"Maybe your first instinct to get a new partner was right, maybe you just got so close the only way to go was farther away. One of you doesn't trust the other." She said with expert knowledge.

"Hey, you wanna talk about something?" Olivia asked noticing that Emily had become reserved.

"Nope, this is about you." She said with a little smile.

"I trust him completely. I'm the one who fucked up." She mumbled the last part but Emily caught it.

"I'm sure you guys have put your life on the line for each other before, you guys trust each other with your lives and then you just up and leave there's the communication and trust issue there. Even if you don't believe it he does."

"Maybe there is, and maybe I need to talk to him but I won't if he won't. It wasn't my fault I was re assigned under cover! And I come back to find that he's screwing his new partner and then he gets back with his wife. I don't know. I don't know him anymore." She said quietly looking down, how was she going to do that?

"At least you realize it. It could be much worse, you could be stubborn and not do anything about it."

"But I was stubborn, and I did nothing about it. I don't know what to do."

Elliot heard the sadness in her voice and just wanted to run in there and hug her, comfort her, do something. The fact that he caused this much strain on her upset him and he quietly walked out of the room in shame.

"All I have to say is talk to him. Yell at him. Push him. As long as you communicate with him it'll be fine. Just try not to hurt him too much." She said with a soft smile.

"Are you sure you're fourteen?" Olivia said laughing at Emily's maturity.

"Well, I'm fourteen but sometimes I can act five." She said smiling. "But you know, sometimes people need to mature, I guess I did it earlier then others."

"Some people never mature." Olivia said rolling her eyes thinking about people she's delt with in the past.

"Alright, I think I'm ready to just finish the damn interview and go home." Emily said getting up. "But you remember a promise is a promise."

"I know." Olivia said, she wished she could get this poor girl some help but she was insistent on dealing with it on her own. She'll help her, even if Emily didn't know it. She'd find a way.

"And just talk it out with him. I hate it when relationships go sour when there was something that could have prevented it."

69696969696969696969696969696969696969

"Mom, go to work," Emily said as she walked down the stairs in her work out clothes, her iPod clipped to her arm, and a bottle of water in her hand. "I'm going to go work out and you're going to go to work."

"No. I'm going to go to the gym with you." Since the previous day Lacy had not left her daughters side.

"I'm fine. It'll be good for you to go to work, get your mind off some things. Please, I'm asking you, I have my phone." Emily needed a second alone this was getting crazy.

After her mother reluctantly left to go to work Emily jogged the quick two blocks to her gym, it was snowing and it helped clear her mind.


	3. Portions for Foxes

AN: okay sorry, it wasn't snowing it was raining, and it's early summer

AN: okay sorry, it wasn't snowing it was raining, and it's early summer. Sorry for lack of updates I blame it on lack of inspiration. 

Ps—lyrics and whatever are owned by Rilo Kiley

I just borrowed them

696969696969696969

The rain, albeit sticky and humid, still had a calming effect on Emily as she jogged her way to the gym.

69696969696969696969

After her work out Emily decided to take a long shower. She plugged her iHome in and pressed shuffle as she undressed and turned the tap to hot. 

The scalding hot water had no effect on Emily's mental state as it cascaded down her back, making her scalp raw and skin pruney. By the time she realized the effects that the water had caused her it had turned somewhat of a lukewarm and she decided to get out.

She got out of the shower and Rilo Kiley's Portion of Foxes was on

Her phone chimed and she looked at the caller, decided she was not in the mood to make small talk with one of her friends she threw the phone against the wall and watched it crash to the floor, breaking into a couple different pieces. She sighed and sunk to the floor, pulling her knees up to her chest. 

_There's blood in my mouth 'cause I've been biting my tongue all week _

_I keep on talkin' trash but I never say anythin'_

She leaned back against the wall and her head made a soft klunk as it made contact, she wondered what the hell was wrong with her as she silently sobbed, for what she did not know. 

_And the talkin' leads to touchin' _

_and the touchin' leads to sex _

_and then there is no mystery left_

Still feeling dirty she threw the towel off of her and growled in frustration. Fuck my life, she though.

Taking the comforter off of her bed she tossed it across the room and layed down naked on the cold sheets. Not understanding what was going on in her life she once again growled as she stood in front of the full length mirror.

_And It's bad news _

_Baby I'm bad news _

_I'm just bad news, bad news, bad news_

She sighed as she assessed the damage; she had finger marks on her neck, and bruises along her torso. Shit. Fuck. 

Her heart was still pounding from running away from him, running home. She really hoped he didn't follow her, but in the state she left him in she highly doubted he didn't.

_I know I'm alone if I'm with or without you _

_but just bein' around you offers me another form of relief _

_When the loneliness leads to bad dreams _

_and the bad dreams lead me to callin' you_

"Hello?" Emily said with a shaky voice when Olivia answered her phone.

"Benson."

"Olivia. I don't know how it happened, I don't understand…" Emily trailed off as she put her head in-between her legs and let out a gut-wrenching sob. 

"Emily? What's wrong what happened?" Olivia asked, panic and fear laced in her normally soothing voice.

_and I call you and say "C'MERE!" _

_And it's bad news _

_Baby I'm bad news _

_I'm just bad news, bad news, bad news_

Olivia let herself in and founded Emily in her room sitting on the hard wooden floor, completely naked.

She gasped when she ran up to her, "what happened?" She immediately asked.

Emily shook her head and looked Olivia in her eyes; she looked so empty, so helpless. Not the strong Emily she met the day before. "I just, I don't know." 

"I'm taking you to the hospital, where you attacked? Raped? Where? Here?"

The questions came rapid fire and all Emily could do was sit there silently as Olivia helped her up and into some clothes. She was numb, nothing could be felt, she assumed this was what it felt like to be paralyzed, to see and hear everything around you, but to not have the ability to stop it or control it.

_'Cause you're just damage control _

_for a walking corpse like me - like you _

"I don't know what happened." Olivia said to the doctor who was about to check Emily. "I got a call and I saw the bruises and suspected the worst. There's somebody after her. Oh God."

"Olivia." Emily said softly from the exam table, finally finding her voice. "He didn't rape me." 

"Sweetie." Olivia said rushing to Emily's side. "What happened? Are you okay?" 

"I'm fine. He didn't rape me though." Emily said finding a stronger voice. "Just tossed me around a bit, but trust me I got a couple punches in." She said with her usual persona. 

"He's going to do a rape kit just in case is that okay?" Olivia asked softly, not sure what was going on with Emily.

"Yeah, whatever." She mumbled as she lay down on the table.

_'Cause we'll all be _

_Portions for foxes _

_Yeah we'll all be _

_Portions for foxes _

An hour and a half later, Emily was sleeping in the hospital and her parents hadn't been contacted yet. Olivia wanted to wait to speak with her, herself .

"Detective!" The doctor said rushing up to Olivia. "The results of the rape kit were negative except for a broken hymen, which can be explained by a childhood accident or consensual sex, anything."

Although she knew this information she nodded and entered the hospital room, "what happened?" Olivia asked softly, cautious as she walked closer to Emily.


End file.
